Jocelyn the kind

Stuck up but glorious Moira doesn’t know how lucky she is to have a friend like Jocelyn. She gives her a part in the Jazzagals and all but lets her take over. She supports her career and talks to her like the big star Moira thinks she is (rather than the slightly washed up soap star that she actually is). She lets David and Moira use her kitchen even though she clearly doesn’t want to (and they don’t even know how to fold the cheese…). And she opts not to ultimately compete with Moira for the role of town councillor. Though to be fair the competitiveness doesn’t sit well with Jocelyn. “The other day, I called another driver an effing moron,” she admits. “I didn’t say the ‘f’ word, but I said, ‘effing, ‘ and that is not me!”

A truly heroic bit of emotional intelligence and selflessness comes in an exchange with Moira after Jocelyn has taken her for a pamper day at a local salon (Moira says “let’s not and say we did” when Joce first offers. Rude). Moira emerges with a hair do identical to Jocelyn’s, which she clearly hates.

“I know you hate your hair, Moira. Almost as much as you hate this town,” she says. “But there’s a possibility you could be here a really long time. May I offer you something? The people here are just trying to help you, and there’ll be days when your wigs need conditioning. Or one of your fashion-y blouses shrinks in the dryer, and you’ll have to go to Janine’s. Or get a shirt at the Blouse Barn, just like the rest of us. And I would hate for that day to catch you by surprise.”

Jocelyn the devoted

Look, nobody wants to body shame, but it is hard to ignore the fact that Roland Schitt is kind of grim. The ineffectual, lazy mayor of Schitt’s Creek, he’s basically a small town Betelgeuse with a mullet. But Jocelyn loves him. The two have been married for 27 years, we learn, and many references are made to the couple’s love life and Roland’s virility (ewww).

“It’s just that I know what it’s like to be in bed with a naked Roland Schitt, and I am powerless against that,” says Joceyln. 

So lovely is Joceyln as a wife that she lets Roland buy her coconut macaroons every Valentines Day even though she is very allergic. “Yeah, every Valentine’s Day I just rash right up,” she laughs. “Last year my throat almost completely shut.”